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scareykatt
Tuesday, 4 March 2003

My Husband, The Cop
By Kazz Falcon

Last night was a close call for him
He was almost kill
This bad guy shot him a few times.
I knew that day was coming.
I was sick and worried.
I didn't want him to be a police officer any more
It was too dangerous.
I really hoped he change his mind
I can't go on living like this
I loved him so much
I don't want to lose him at all
His job really scared me
I was a nervous wreck
Now, the shoot out made matters worst
He doesn't want to listen to reason
I begged him to quit the police force
He won't stop being a cop
He loves his job very much
I really don't know what to do
I was truly afraid for my husband, the cop.


Posted by scareykatt at 3:51 AM EST
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Monday, 3 March 2003

Child Support
By Kazz Falcon

I split up with my wife last year.
We had a son together.
She demanded I give her child support
I flat out refused
I can't afford it
I had a low paying job
Yet, she was a greedy bitch
She wants all my money to go to the son
Hell, no!
She had no right to my money
Our divorce was finale few weeks ago
I was doing the best I could to help him
Right now, I was on a tight income
She was too damn lazy to work
Maybe, I should get full custody
She needs to stop whining
She was driving me away from our son
She was too angry and bitter
She won't get child support
  

Posted by scareykatt at 3:51 AM EST
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Sunday, 2 March 2003

Hush Money
By Kazz Falcon

I knew a terrible secret
I can't tell anyone
I don't want my life to be in danger
HE offered me an intrigue deal
I couldn’t refuse the money
It will help me in the long run
I was behind the bills and the rent
Also, I can get out of debt
Under one condition, I can't tell anyone
The money will help me a great deal
I can offer my kid the life I didn't had
I can move to a better neighborhood
I will be safe as long I play the cards right
Man, I won't have to worry that much
I can take care of my only kid
He will do better in school
His future depends on the money
I won't let him down
Damn, I better take the deal
I know it was wrong
I was desperate for the money
I must take care of my son at nay cost
I made the deal with the devil
He gave me the hush money


Posted by scareykatt at 3:49 AM EST
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Saturday, 1 March 2003

The Locket
By Kazz Falcon

I wanted to give my love something special
His birthday was coming up this Saturday
The locket will represent our love 4ever
It dawned on me
I decided to use that description
That was just perfect for the locket
He will enjoy his present very much
We had a nice quite time on his birthday
A few friends was over
We had a gay old time with each other
He loved all his presents
I was saving the best for last
He wondered what happened to my present
I fibbed, "I couldn't find anything."
He does have everything
There was nothing to give him
He was disappointed
All our friends went home
He still can't believe it
I mentioned he forgot to eat some cake
He doesn't like eating cake; it was fattening
I made him closed his eyes
He didn't trust me at all
He thought I will stuff the cake in his mouth
The lights was out
A candlestick was lit on the kitchen table.
He sat down at the table
I screamed, "Surprise!"
He quickly opened up his eyes
Once again, he was disappointed
All he saw was a small cupcake
I knew he couldn't resist it
I made the best damn cupcakes in the world
He took a bite of the cupcake
Then he grabbed his drink
He noticed the locket in the glass.
He was cheerful that I gave him something special
He read the description
"Our hearts are 4ever locked together."
He started to cry
It was the best birthday present he ever received


Posted by scareykatt at 3:48 AM EST
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Friday, 28 February 2003

Losing Focus
By Kazz Falcon

I was working on a book
It was due by December 2004
I had a month left
Everything was going smoothly
I ran into an old friend
I haven't seen him since childhood
We caught up on old times
We hung around a lot
I completely forgotten about the book
We had so much fun
I was smitten by him
We spent every waking moment together
We can't get enough each other
I moved in with him
I put everything on hold
I did everything for him
I cooked
I cleaned
I took out the trash
I loved him so much
There was something missing
I felt I was lost
I wasn't happy
Don't get me wrong
Our love was still strong
I missed writing very much
That I lost focus


Posted by scareykatt at 3:44 AM EST
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Thursday, 27 February 2003

Time For An Awakening
By Kazz Falcon
Dedicated to Richard Chamberlain

You probably know me quite well
I starred in numerous blockbuster movies in the 1960/70’s
Of course, I was in a hit TV show in the 1980’s
I had a pretty fan base
All women fancy yours truly
In the last few years, I led a comfortable life
I could less about my public image now
Most women saw me as a romantic man in my movies
I played the roles quite good
Even some proposed marriage in their letters
Stars still get those kinds of letters
I wouldn’t take those proposals seriously
I was already seeing someone at that time
I wouldn’t dare to cheat at all
My special someone would have talk to the tabloids
You know I can’t let that happen
My public image would be destroyed
Today, I don’t give a damn about that image
Hollywood created it for the audience
They saw a bankable star in me
They would do anything to cover up the truth
They did the same thing with Rock Hudson
He was another prefect leading man for the movies
For all my fans, I was ready to face the truth
I was tired of hiding from everyone
There was nothing wrong with me
I just happened…happened to be different
“Different,” you wondered
I wasn’t ashamed of my life
It was a part of me
I embraced myself with the truth
The truth would set you free
As you get older, you would know what means the most to you
I found real love I could count on for the rest of my life
I would never give up the love at all
Being gay was so me; I don’t want to give up my life


Posted by scareykatt at 3:41 AM EST
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Wednesday, 26 February 2003

Gift Givers
By Kazz Falcon

I wasn’t Santa at all
I was only a HIV + person
What else can I say?
I gave people the HIV virus
They wanted to be a part of the HIV community
They didn’t seemed to care at all
I gladly gave them what they want
No questions ask
You could say it’s Russian Roulette
My penis was the gun
Hey, it was their lifes
I can’t complained, neither they can
Sometimes, they paid me money
No, I wasn’t a prostitute
They want HIV at any cost
I wasn’t making that much on my job
I couldn’t refuse the money
I wouldn’t turn down money either
It will help me in the long run
Whatever works for them, works for me


Posted by scareykatt at 3:26 AM EST
Updated: Sunday, 1 October 2006 3:43 AM EDT
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Tuesday, 25 February 2003

Bug Chasers
By Kazz Falcon

I set out to become HIV infected
I didn’t care how I got the disease
I was never big on drugs
Sex was the next best thing
I had a lot of promiscuous, unsafe sex
I was popular at the bathhouses, sex clubs and the sex parties
I often had it over five times a week
On the weekend, I always lost count
I couldn’t get sex enough
Sex was my whole being
It was my main reason to live
I lived to be serve by any men at any cost
I couldn’t stop thinking about it
I saw being part of the HIV-AIDS community as a way of belonging
I looked forward to that day
Everyone has a sense of belonging somewhere
My place was with HIV community
I mostly seek out “the gift givers”
They were HIV + men who knowingly and deliberately infect others
I simply don’t care about the consequences
I celebrated and advertised bareback on the Internet
Because I wanted to be HIV infected
HIV + people was living longer
They often don't show the outside signs of the disease
No matter what, life was good at either end


Posted by scareykatt at 3:25 AM EST
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Monday, 24 February 2003

Denied Alcoholic
By Kazz Falcon

Say it with me
I don’t have a drinking problem
Say it again
I don’t have a drinking problem
Once more
I don’t have a drinking problem
Yes, some friends believed I had one
What do they really know about me?
My life was perfect in every way
I had a wonderful boss, beautiful place and cool friends
I was so freaking happy with my life
I don’t have any problems at all
I paid my rent and bills on time
I was never late at my job
Still, they can’t get it out of their minds
I was able to hold onto everything
My life was under control
Come on now
I don’t have a drinking problem
Say it
Yes, I partied at the clubs every weekend
I was a social drinker


Posted by scareykatt at 3:25 AM EST
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Sunday, 23 February 2003

Things Never Change
By Kazz Falcon

I dated my ex boyfriend
Things have never been so much better
We started to fall back in love
He remembered my favorite food
We had so much fun dating
We got to know each other again
We meant so much to each other
It was good to be in each other’s lifes again
Life was fabulous with him
We took things very slowly
Last time, we went too fast
Something happened
He showed up drunk at my place
I don’t believed it
He hasn’t stop drinking
He was still working as a bartender
I gave him another chance at love
He just walked all over me
He claimed he didn’t have a drinking problem
He was happy with me
Yet, I wasn’t happy with him
I can’t do this again
I just can’t
It was hard the first time
It nearly destroy my life
His drinking reopened old wounds
I still felt the knife in my heart
It cut deeper into my soul
I cried out loud in pain
I wished I hadn’t went back to him
Things never change


Posted by scareykatt at 3:23 AM EST
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Saturday, 22 February 2003

Reunited With The Ex
By Kazz Falcon

I ran into my ex the other day
We haven’t seen each other since last year
Things got in the way of the relationship
We didn’t parted on good terms
We caught up with each other
He straightened out his life
He was sorry for the pain he caused me
I was happy he went to rehab
He wanted another chance with me
I didn’t think it was a good ideal
I moved on with my life
We were so different from each other
We grown apart too
He was attraction to me as much I was to him
He mentioned our break up was his wake up call
It changed his life
He has new outlook on life too
He couldn’t do it without me in his life
I thought about another relationship with him
We both had enough time to heal
We went our separate ways
We rebuilt our lifes
We were happier with our lifes
Yet, we found each other again
Could it work for the second time?
Should we give it a try?
Would we drift apart again?
Only time would tell
We will take things slowly
We will remain at our own apartments
I was reunited with the ex
 

Posted by scareykatt at 3:22 AM EST
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Friday, 21 February 2003

Innocence Victims
By Kazz Falcon

I came into the life of crime
It wasn’t a life I want for myself
It just happened
It was forced on me
I couldn’t do a thing about it
I threatened by my friend
Damn, it was out of control
I was in too deep
I couldn’t get enough sleep
I saw the fear in her eyes
I wanted to help her anyway I can
There weren’t any phones at my place
He knew I would call the police
We were somewhere in the country
No one would have a chance to find her
I promised her that I would protect her from him
We need to find a way out of the mess
She trusted me and has faith in me
I didn’t mean any harm to her
It was never my ideal
My friend and I were talking one night
We wondered how we could get fast money
One thing led to the next
We were pretty drunk that night
Weeks later, he brought home a little girl
He claimed she was his niece
It didn’t strike me as odd
The girl was acting strangely
He mentioned it was being in a new place
I could relate to her
She doesn’t how to react around with strangers
Few days later, I read the newspaper
There was an article about a missing girl
She fitted the girl’s description to the tee
I confronted him with the truth
He admitted it was the same girl
Damn, I don’t believe he could do such a thing
I wanted to take her home in the car
She needs to be home with her family
He grabbed the keys from my hand
He mentioned I was in deep as he was
He would turn on me if I tell the police
It was his story against mine
He ruined my life in the mess
I just wanted to do the right thing
I had no choice in the matter
I didn’t want to end up in jail
The girl and I were the innocence victims


Posted by scareykatt at 3:21 AM EST
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Thursday, 20 February 2003

Another Chance
By Kazz Falcon

I made a drastic mistake
I slept with another man
I was drunk at the club
This guy took me home with him
I went home in the morning
My boyfriend wondered where I was
I wasn’t a good lair
He saw I had the same clothes on
I was being upfront about last night
He had a hard time with it
We were in a monogamous relationship
We didn’t fool around with the men
We were committed to our love
I did a stupid thing
I wasn’t proud of the fling
I was happy with him
I didn’t meant it to happen
It just happened
He wasn’t please with me
I begged for his forgiveness
I didn’t want anyone else, but him
I destroyed our relationship
He broke up with me
I pleaded with him for another chance


Posted by scareykatt at 3:20 AM EST
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Wednesday, 19 February 2003

Here I Sat
By Kazz Falcon

Here I sat in my chair
I pondered what to do
Nothing seems interesting to me
Something that couldn’t grab my attention
Anything wouldn’t give me sparks
Here I sat in front of the computer
I was about to give up the search
The jobs wasn’t there for me
I went to all the employment sites
So far, I came up empty handed
Here I sat with the newspaper
I circled all the job leads I want
I called them up on the phone
There were either taken or faraway from me
I was bored with looking for a job
Here I sat stared into space
I can’t go on like this
I had a bad feeling
I need to find a job soon
I was running out of time
Here I sat crying
I pleaded with God
I asked, I shall receive
Things must get better with my life
I don’t want to live in the street
Here I sat in the chair


Posted by scareykatt at 3:20 AM EST
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Tuesday, 18 February 2003

The Family Plead
By Kazz Falcon

Hello, people and the press
This was the hardest thing for us
My little girl was kidnapped in the park
We couldn’t bare of losing her
She was our pride and joy
Words couldn’t describe how we felt
Only the emotions spoke volumes for us
It broke our heart
Our precious girl was missing
We want everyone to be on the lookout
Please, whatever u do, call the police
Any lead may help capture the kidnapper
We want our little girl back home where she belongs
If you are a parent, you will doing a favor for your kid too
Please call the police
I offered $500,000 to the capture of the creep
Don’t evoke the kidnapper
Let the police do their job
My little girl is counting on you
Let bring her back home
We need to stop the madness everywhere
Your loved one may be at risk
If someone is suspicious, call the police
Please call the police
We might be too late
I really hope not
She could be already be dead
God, please give us the strength
We can’t let her to be dead
She deserved to be alive
Kids are harmless
Look at our tears
We’re crying out for help
We can’t let this ever happen again
Our kids should be safe at any cost
My heart goes out for every kid out there
We missed her very much
We loved her as much as life itself
God bless you


Posted by scareykatt at 3:19 AM EST
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Monday, 17 February 2003

The Kidnapped Girl
By Kazz Falcon

Help me
Please somebody help me
Someone kidnapped me from the park
I didn’t saw his face
He wore a black mask
My mother tried to rescue me
He knocked her down to the ground
God, I was frightened
I didn’t know where he took me
He tied me up with rope
I can’t run away at all
God, he hurt me very badly
The rope was too tight around my ankles
He drove every direction
I couldn’t tell you where he took me
He confused me good in the ride
I was in a tiny room with a mattress on the floor
He served me food under the door
I can’t get out
The windows was bricked
No one will heard me scream
This was the worst nightmare of my young life
I wished my family would find me soon
I truly missed them
I cried every day in bed
The future looked so bleak for me


Posted by scareykatt at 3:18 AM EST
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Sunday, 16 February 2003

The Kidnapper
By Kazz Falcon

I kidnapped this girl
Oh, how much I wanted to
She was the perfect girl for me
Her parents was pretty rich
Of course, they will do anything to get her back
I wouldn’t give her back at all
They need to pay me dearly
She doesn’t come cheap
I won’t settle anything less than $2 million
If the police gets involve, the price will go up
I didn’t feel any remorse at all
No one will give me a break
I tried to find another job
They turned their back on me
It was so hard on me
I couldn’t pay the rent, the bills and etc
Desperate times means desperate measures
I had no other choice at all
I don’t give a damn about her family
I was a scapegoat for her daddy
He promised he will take care of everything
Bull!
He was only looking out for himself
He was a saint in everyone’s eyes
He could do no wrong
Why should I feel remorse about the kid?
I did it for the money and payback
He deserved all the pain I brought to him
He won’t get away with it
Revenge was sweet and tasty
It will be even sweeter when I get all the money
Until then, they won’t see her ever again


Posted by scareykatt at 3:17 AM EST
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Saturday, 15 February 2003

Jesus Christ Entered
By Kazz Falcon

Jesus Christ entered into my heart
I felt his presence in my being
It was an awesome feeling
I have never been so alive
I had his warmth
I had his love
I had his comfort
I celebrated my newfound happiness
I was at peace
He took all the pain away from him
I don’t have any more sorrows
I was glad I didn’t shut the door on him
I gave him all my problems
He changed my life drastically
Life couldn’t get any better than this


Posted by scareykatt at 3:15 AM EST
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Friday, 14 February 2003

Non Believer
By Kazz Falcon

I don’t believe it
I just can’t
It was really, really him
Oh my God!
Damn, why couldn’t it be someone else?
I don’t believed in him
I had never believe that there was a God
I wasn’t one of his followers
I don’t believe in the bible either
It was a bunch of lies
Some verses are hypocritical
The bible misled people
I wished he hasn’t show up
He came too late, too many years passed
He wasn’t there when I need him the most
I was at the most lonely and horrifying time of my life
My parents was murdered outside of a restaurant
Then I was placed with my abusive aunt
Hello, what kind of God would do that to his own children?
I had an hard time accepting my parents’ death
I had to deal with my aunt too
I can’t trust him anymore
There was no God in my world
He was worthless in my life
I don’t feel sympathy or love from him at all
He was an illusion that a bunch of people made up
He was the almighty powerful God
Yeah, right
I can’t depend on an illusion    
I was proud to admit that I was a atheist


Posted by scareykatt at 3:15 AM EST
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Thursday, 13 February 2003

Knock, Knock
By Kazz Falcon

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Knock, knock
Who’s there?
There wasn’t any answer
Knock, knock
Knock, knock
I looked through the peephole
I couldn’t see anyone
I went back watching TV
Knock, knock
Who is it?
Knock, knock
Please go away
Knock, knock
I still can’t see someone through the peephole
It dawned on me
It could be someone short
I opened the door
I was wrong
Nobody was there
Knock, knock
I rushed to the door
Once again, nobody was there
I realized it could be those pesky kids
Knock, knock
Damn them, damn them to hell
I grabbed a cup of water
I opened the door and tossed it on them
Oops, it was my next-door neighbor
He heard some screaming from my place
I explained that the kids played nigger knocking
He mentioned nobody entered the apartments
I found that odd
I turned on the radio
Here we go again
Knock, knock
Knock, knock
Knock, knock
I tried to ignore it
The knock, knocks became louder than the music
I got madder
I opened the door
Nobody was there
I looked around outside
I couldn’t see anyone
I went back inside
Knock, knock
Why me?
I just want a relaxing day
Is that too much to ask?
Knock, knock
Hmm, that was strange
It was coming from inside of my place
Knock, knock
It drove me crazy
I searched everywhere for that person
I still couldn’t find anyone
Knock, knock
All along, I was such a fool
It was a different door
I felt it in my heart
It was Jesus Christ


Posted by scareykatt at 3:14 AM EST
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